Surrogate Offspring, Karma's New Pet Devision
Karma Press Release January 28th 903SD: Karma Subsidiary Surrogate OffSpring Reveals New Pets MORT CENTRAL, MORT: A new Karma subsidiary, Surrogate OffSpring, revealed their newest range of customised pets for Operatives and Employees. Following on from the success of the standard DACs (DNA Altered Canines) and DAFs (DNA Altered Felines) that Karma released two years ago, comes a new range of pets to cater for anyone's taste. For the first time Karma, through its newest subsidiary, Surrogate OffSpring, revealed plans for various new animals including DASs (DNA Altered Saurians) and DARs (DNA Altered Rodents). For the first time buyers will be able to specify the exact look and style of each variant and will also be able to choose from eight different personality specifications. Project Developer Dr. Jill Majors announced that, "For the first time Operatives will truly be able to pick exactly what they want as a pet straight from us here at Surrogate OffSpring" adding that, "We can cater for all tastes, whether you want a sofa sized Saurian or just a few Aquatics on your lounge table". "If you want it to start off small and grow to full size we can do it. Hell if you want it to fluctuate its size through out its life we can do that as well!" said Head Researcher Dr. Miles Loeb who was in charge of all of the development work on the gene-codes. "For the first time Operatives will be able to buy animals that more accurately reflect their personality, rather than just the choices of Dog or Cat that we previously offered," added Assistant Developer Dr Isaac Crystal. Surrogate OffSpring is a wholly owned subsidiary of Karma Biotechnology Inc. Karma is a wholly owned subsidiary of SLA Industries. All of the new variants will be available from official Surrogate OffSpring stores throughout Mort Central and UpTown. For more details or your nearest store call 222 KARMA PETS. Surrogate OffSpring Karma's Pet Project Karen Dysan interviews the people behind Karma's newest and already successful subsidiary Surrogate OffSpring. Arriving ten minutes early I wait for my two interviewees whilst draining an early morning coffee. It was their idea not mine to hold the interview at such an early hour and in such a strange location. This QuickRoast cafe is like any other, with its plastic cutlery and wipe clean table - not the sort of place you would think that two people who are in charge of a 200 billion credit budget would come to. As Dr Majors entered the cafe I watch as she signals to the waitress behind the counter. Not saying a word the waitress starts to prepare a cappuccino whilst Dr Majors removes her coat and walks briskly over to my table. Dressed in a 10k-credit suit she stands out more in this place than I do, but no one batters an eye here. As she introduced herself to me (even though she hasn't been off the teevee in the last few weeks and everyone who watches it would know her) I can't help realising that in front of me is someone that despite her appearance and her job likes things to be simple. As she stirs a brown sugar in to one of the cappuccinos that has materialised in front of her, Surrogate OffSpring's second in command, Isaac Crystal, strolls through the door changing his DeathSuit from a raincoat to that of a normal suit. Introducing himself (who again has been on teevee non-stop for the last few weeks) he sits down and apologises for being late. Whilst he slurps his coffee I ask the one question that had been prevalent in my thoughts since I arrived. Dr Majors, Dr Crystal, why did you ask to be interviewed here? Dr Majors: "First off, when we are here it is just Jill and Isaac. And as for this place, what's wrong with it?" They both share a slight smile at my apparent flustered nature before Dr Crystal, sorry, Isaac leans forward spreading his hands wide. Isaac: "This is where it all started. Jill and I were discussing project ideas here around the time that Karma had just released the standard DAC and DAFs and we came up with the idea of developing further animal types as well as varying options for them. Our initial idea came about when Jill was trying to work out what to do with her kittens when she had to travel to Artery to oversee the gene-code manufacturing over there. I mentioned it was a pity that you couldn't just get the kittens to hibernate like the Low Waves can do. Everything else just sort of evolved around that." Jill: "Well initially we were just thinking of more ways to upgrade the existing DACs and DAFs and then we got on to other animals and then the next thing we knew we were running a pet store." Again a shared smile, but this time three ways. Their little pet store has made Karma over 500 million credits in the last few weeks and it looks like they will cover all of their development costs within the first six months of business. Can you give a quick overview of the major changes you have implemented? Jill: "Even though the initial idea was for our DACs and DAFs to be able to hibernate, it was actually the idea of additional animal types that secured the development money. Through marketing we had found out that the majority of pets were going to Humans and Ebons and bizarrely Stormers. The other races didn't seem that interested in having a cat or a dog and this was limiting the market for Karma. We undertook several surveys to establish why the other races didn't want cats or dogs and a lot of it was due to their heritage or upbringing. The Shaktar tended to want something a little more robust than cats or dogs, and Brain Wasters were only interested in cats that were at waist height. We looked around for alternative animals to best fit the other races profiles." Isaac: "We now produce six different species of creature; DASs, DARs, DAAs, DAPs and DAEs. That is Saurians, Rodents, Avians, Piscines and Equines. Oh, and the original DACs and DAFs. The Rodents are mainly aimed at the Brain Waster market and we have had good feed back from Wraith Raiders as well. The Avians were a late addition and come with wingspans of up to three metres. The DAPs or fish are our cheap option and come in all variants including those found on Kn'nth and Static. The Saurians caused us the most problems, mainly with trying to limit their size. Reptiles from Kn'nth can grow up to ten metres long, but we were more interested in the smaller variants." Jill: "That's not to say that you can't get a ten metres long one if you want - we make all types for all people." Isaac: "We also give an option of different personalities for any of the animal types. These split into how intelligent and how loyal you want you pet to be. Now you can choose if you want your pet to follow you around all the time or whether it will look after itself." What do you think has been the biggest improvement on the basic DACs/DAFs? Isaac: "That would have to be the improvements that Miles (Dr Loeb - Head Researcher) made on the maturity-codings. You can choose whether your pet starts small and grows larger or vice versa. You can even have it fluctuate its size due to seasonal changes or completely at random. However, Miles' biggest improvement was reversing the ageing effect throughout all the variations. Now when it gets too old we can treat the body making it young again, but still keeping the animals memory and personality intact. In effect its body becomes young again but its mind stays the same. Now your pet can live as long as you do, even passed onto a different generation if you want." What will Surrogate OffSpring do with pets that people no longer want? Jill: "I wouldn't of thought that would happen. They are after all getting the very pet that they want with all of the options available. If someone does need a minor change, for example they want to change the skin colour or its size, then these can be done at any time with a simple injection. We couldn't do more complicated changes like changing its loyalty or intelligence though that would be too dangerous for the animal. I doubt that the animal would cope with having its personality played around with, but then I guess I wouldn't like it too much if someone tried the same with me!" Isaac: "We are toying with the idea of setting up a 'recycling centre', where people can buy unwanted animals that they might not be able to afford otherwise. Of course they would be stuck with the personality model that was in the creature but we would offer cosmetic enhancements at a discount as well. We won't worry about the recycling centre unless there becomes a need for it though." Jill: "And we'll have to change the name as well..." Again a shared smile between the two of them. By all reports they have been working very closely together, but I will leave it to the gossip columns to read anything deeper in to that. With the half-hour that they could spare almost up I ask them my final question. Do either of you have any pets and what are they? Jill: "I have a couple of permi-kittens, one black, one pink. Both are original DAFs, so they will only be around for a few years. Who knows, maybe I'll get myself two more with fluctuating sizes. That way they can take it turns as to who looks after who." Isaac: "I have a Shaktarian Triterapod about knee height, that keeps puncturing my sofa with its three head horns. Luckily it is a Karma sofa so it self heals, otherwise it would cost me a fortune to repair." As they leave they ask me what kind of animal I would like and laugh as I suggest a mini-Carnivorous Pig. "Give us time, " says Isaac, helping Jill with her coat, "and we'll create a mini-Carrien to go with it". With these two running Surrogate OffSpring, I wouldn't be surprised if they did create one as well, just to see if they could. -Karen Dysan = Surrogate OffSpring: Choice Selection Sheet = Please follow the stages below to assist Surrogate OffSpring with your pet selection. * DAC - DNA Altered Canines - Dogs, everything from a chiaua to a dire wolf. Also ask about our Domino Dog range. * DAF - DNA Altered Felines - Cats, including housecats, wild cats, pumas, tigers, lions & everything inbetween. * DAA - DNA Altered Avian - Birds of all varieties. * DAE - DNA Altered Equines - Primarily Equine in nature, these can be tailored to resemble similar 4 legged animals. * DAS - DNA Altered Saurians & Serpents - This covers Lizards, Serpents & even some mythical 'monsters'. * DAR - DNA Altered Rodents - Mice, Rats as well as Squirrels & similarly small creatures. * DAP - DNA Altered Piscines - Fish & Aquatic Animals First Stage Choose basic type and full-grown size of creature. Additional sizes can be arranged through discussion with your local Surrogate OffSpring representative. Second Stage Choose base Life Span. All cost changes are to base cost only. Creature may last longer than indicated life span, but is guaranteed to live at least as long as base amount of years. Third Stage Growth pattern. All cost charges are to base cost only. Normal growth pattern is from child (approx. 1/4 adult size) to adult size in first 25% of Life Span. Full Grown is at adult size from purchase. Seasonal is at Normal Growth pattern during 6 months of the year, at 25% larger for three months and 25% smaller for three months of the year. Fluctuating is at +-50% of Normal growth, varying at random Fourth Stage Intelligence Personality. All cost charges are to base cost only. Basic allows for general animal intelligence, for example finding food. Smart intelligence involves simple training, for example using litter trays. Very Smart intelligence involves advanced training for example opening doors. Intelligence personality is not applicable to DAPs Fifth Stage Fifth Stage: Loyalty Personality. All cost charges are to base cost only. Dependently Loyal implies the creature needs to be near its owner(s) otherwise it gets depressed. Loyal personality implies it will like spending time with its owner, but can cope with being on its own. Independently Loyal implies it can cope easily on its own but will spend time with its owner. Independent implies the creature prefers its own company to that of its owner, acting with out any real concern to its owner. Guard is a special loyalty to a place rather than a person. Please contact Surrogate OffSpring for more details. Sixth Stage Ferocity Personality. All cost charges are to base cost only. Docile means that the creature will not attack even to defend itself unless critically hurt. Defensive implies the creature will only attack if hurt first and will prefer to run away when given the opportunity. Moody implies the creature goes through mood swings, which determine how it treats those that don't fit into its loyalty personality. Aggressive implies the creature will attack if attacked and is unlikely to retreat from attacking. Hostile implies it will attack anything that doesn't fit into its loyalty programme. Seventh Stage Additional Upgrades All upgrade cost are independent of size or species. Standard colours - No cost. Choose from our various designs Advanced colours - 50 credits to choose any intricate colour scheme Advanced patterning - 150 credits to determine any complex pattern and colour scheme. Enhanced features - 250 credits. More time is spent refining the appearance of the creature making it appear to be very high quality. Advanced sculpting - 1000 credits. The creature's appearance can be modified to resemble anything that the buyer wants. Immunity from known illnesses - No cost. Creature is immune to all known DA Creature illnesses. Non-serious illnesses - 150 credits to allow your creature to have authentic non-lethal illnesses during its life span. Hibernation - 500 credits. Through manipulating a pressure nodule at the back of the neck of the creature it will prepare itself for hibernation in seven days time. During this time it will require at least double the amount of food that it normally eats and during hibernation will require a warm secure place to sleep in. The hibernation will last for a maximum of one month but can be stopped early by re-applying pressure to the nodule. It will then take the creature 12 hours before it is back to its usual self (although it will require double the amount of food for a quarter of the time it was in hibernation). If longer durations are required advanced hibernation states can be provided by any Surrogate OffSpring facility. This ability is not available for DAA, due to their requirement for constant movement of water across their gills. Special slow-release food supplements can be bought from Surrogate OffSpring costing 25 credits for one month's supply per size step. Anti-Gerasone treatment - 2000 credits every five years. Due to advancements made in the development of the DN Creatures it is possible to introduce a vaccine into their bodies, which helps prevent them ageing. This treatment can only be undertaken at an official Surrogate OffSpring facility and requires the creature to be carefully monitored for a 96-hour period following the course of injections. A booster injection is required every five years after the minimum life span has been achieved. There is no known age limit that the treatment can not be used for. Medical Insurance - 50 credits a month. To ensure that no harm is done to your pet, Surrogate OffSpring has developed a combination medical insurance and treatment programme that will automatically monitor your pet for signs of injury. Surrogate OffSpring staff will be at your pet's locality within 20 minutes of the injury and all repair fees are covered by the monthly payment. Additionally if your pet dies of natural causes prior to its planned life span, then the owner will be fully reimbursed.